Even when parents have a particularly contentious divorce, they can usually agree that they want to do what’s best for their children. A split can place a lot of stress on your relationship with your children, especially if you’re co-parenting. Fortunately, there are steps you can take to help reduce your children’s feelings of uncertainty.
Here are some tips for helping to ease your children’s transition between homes.
Maintain realistic expectations
You may wish that your children would be thrilled to see you every time they come to your home. However, remember that your children’s lives have also undergone a significant change. Allow them time and space to process their emotions. If they are sometimes moody or unenthusiastic during their visits, don’t take it personally.
Come up with some routine activities
A divorce can upend a child’s expectation of routine and predictability. Establishing a sense of routine when they visit your home can help your children reestablish a sense of security. For example, you could decide to bake cookies every time before they go back to the other parent’s home. This can give them something to look forward to and bring some normalcy back to their world.
Maintain a connection
Technology has made it easier than ever to stay in touch across great distances. If you live far from your ex or don’t see your children too often, it’s important to maintain some type of connection. A simple text or email on occasion can let your children know that they are in your thoughts.
Don’t forget about yourself
It’s easy to focus on the well-being of your children following a divorce at the expense of your own sense of self. Take some time to get used to this transition on your own. Doing so can leave you better prepared to help your children adjust to their new reality.